The New Golden Rule — A Win-Win Formula

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As an Occupational Therapist with experience treating challenged kids from babyhood to teens and beyond, Miriam Manela Frankel encounters all types of parents. Most parents are tired and have limited time–even less emotional energy–to take the steps necessary to make a real difference in the lives of their struggling kids.

It’s not their fault–no blame or shame is involved. Mainly, parents are dealing with work-related stress, strained financial circumstances, a lack of marital harmony, or simply the time commitments of having multiple children.  Their plates are full.

When you have a challenging child–be it learning disabilities, ADHD, etc.–what is a parent to do with limited time and resources? At BLOOM, we offer proven strategies for struggling families to be able to enjoy their children again. Discover unique therapy resources that target behavior to meet you at your point of need and beyond. 

Methods for Dealing With Challenging Children

The New Golden Rule has nothing to do with “Do unto others…”; yet, it can completely turn your life around. The New Golden Rule empowers parents to take charge of their lives, so they can move forward in a way they never envisioned. Until they embrace this new way of coping, one day runs into another, with no hope in sight. 

Let’s face it: it’s always easier to repeat tired, old methods–whether they work or not. It’s much harder to learn a new approach to dealing with your child and implementing it consistently. 

This is very difficult unless you first adopt the New Golden Rule. The New Golden Rules state:  

To double your impact on your children, double your efforts on your personal development.  Learn to accept and value yourself–along with your limitations fully—and it will be much easier to accept and truly love all of your children—even the more challenging ones. With this attitude, you’ll be able to assist them on their journey toward personal growth. 

Methods for Self-Improvement

The journey of parent self-improvement is the key to success. When you can ground yourself with this new approach, you will be able to handle challenging situations better. It is a win-win situation: the initial satisfaction you’ll feel when these methods are applied will fuel future investments into self-improvement and increased success for both parent and child. 

These proven methods of self-improvement will help parents regain control over their lives and empower them to succeed with their challenged kids.

1. Practice calming strategies, such as: 
  • Exhaling: Breath deeply; suck thick liquid, such as yogurt; increase the extent of your “exhale” by eating something tart (which will give you a bigger swallow that will ensure a deeper exhale.
  • The “professor stance”: Place your fingertips together (see attached photo), cross your ankles, place your tongue at the top of your palate and breathe.
  • Drink water.
  • Wash your hands or face with cold water (or very warm water).
  • Chew sharp-tasting or frozen gum. 

2. Self-care–this has been proven to be a performance-enhancing discipline. Robin Sharma, one of the world's premier speakers on “Leadership and Personal Mastery,” has shared the following strategies to increase productivity and to empower people to succeed in making beneficial changes in others: 

  • Drink adequate water.
  • Sleep five to seven hours a night.
  • Wake early before most of the world is awake.
  • Exercise at least four times a week for 20 minutes.
  • Set aside time for prayer—formal or informal.
  • Learn something new almost daily.

3. Journaling–research shows that journaling positively impacts physical well-being. Journaling helps you clarify your thoughts, reduce stress, know yourself better, and solve problems more effectively in all spheres of your life. 

4. List your negative self-assessments and then turn them into positive statements– “I am afraid I don't have the tools to deal with the tantrums” becomes: “I have faith that God will provide me, or has already provided me, with the tools I need to deal with the tantrums.” “I cannot take this anymore” becomes: “I am confident that I am stronger than anything life throws my way. Give me lemons, and I’ll make lemonade!”  

Proven Methods for Dealing with Challenging Children

By teaching yourself the New Golden Rule of accepting yourself and investing time to indulge in self-care, you will empower yourself to embrace new methods of dealing with your challenging offspring. A truly win-win situation.

At BLOOM, our mission is to support parents with online resources to pave a path for their struggling child, with unique remedial resources at their point of need. To learn more about BLOOM, book a free 10-minute discovery call

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